September 13, 2003 in Rochester, WA. I married the love of my life, a man I have been in love with since I was 14 years old. Every year since May 20, 1998, we celebrate another year of us!

am the mom of 4 kids, 3 boys and 1 girl. The girl was not last, she was 3rd. Number 4 was not an "whoops", he was planned. Being a wife and mommy is all I have ever wanted to be.

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Friday, March 18, 2011

The importance of kindness!

   I am not positive if my easily hurt feelings from others telling me I am a bad person or liar, or just breaking me down as a person in general is a weakness or a strength. I say I am unsure of it being a strength or weakness as I can see both sides. 

It is a weakness as it quite hurts my feelings and I dwell upon it entirely far to much. For those whom think so low of you should not consume you so dramatically as it is only hurtful to your inner person to care so much for the kindness of those whom obviously are incapable of such a trait. I find myself dwelling and becoming completely engrossed in the fact that my efforts and my determination to make a valiant attempt to treat someone according to the golden rule "treat others the way you yourself wish to be treated" could be so obviously ignored. That someone could just out right disregard everything I do and call me nasty words or take all the good and twist it into something mean and vindictive, I find so discouraging. 

Yet, I also see it as a strength.  For it constantly makes me re-evaluate myself, it makes me look from another point of view and try and see what they could see. I believe this makes me a better person. I was unable to have another treat me bad and see the good in turning around and trying to still treat them with kindness, continue to give others chances, but as I have gotten older, I have learned the value in loving others no matter what is returned.

 This does not mean making myself a door stop... for I still believe in standing up for myself. I believe in informing others when they hurt your feelings, and standing up for what you believe is the good and honest thing. But I in turn do not treat others based on how they treat me, I treat them how I want to be treated. At the end of the day the most important thing is how I view myself and I consider my ability to continue giving chances and kindness to others as a good thing. 

This does not mean I like everyone, heavens NO! If your mean to me over and over, calling me bad things, and outright showing a complete disregard for how I feel or blaming me for your mistakes or inabilities to be happy, chances are I will not like you. Nor will I continue to put myself in a position to be hurt by you. I will though continue to try to be kind, treat that person with respect when I am in their presents and when I must engage with them.

I do get discouraged, I feel as though, so many people only treat others kindly when they are wanting something, when they are faced with a obstacle that kindness will get them past, or when they lack the genuine character and nature needed to be a authentic and sincere person in their actions. I feel sorry for people who blame others for there unhappiness and only act of kindness to others when they will benefit, for they themselves will never learn to be a happy, loving, genuine adult. They will never have true relationships with others nor experience that unbridled happiness that comes only from within the heart of a truly happy persons love for them self.  Those whom must make others out to be a bad person in order to achieve happiness are truly sad, and for that I feel sorry and quite sad for them. I want to believe in my naive way that these people will realize this at some point. The will learn to treat others with the golden rule, and they will learn that others are not out to get them in this world and if they stop, step back and look at the actions of others without first twisting them, they will begin to see the good in the world and in themselves and in others, and they will become such a wonderful, happy person in turn!

Final thought:

If niceness is like an asset only to be used when it best suits you then why teach kids to be kind in the first place. If they're just going to grow up to be cold-hearted and unfeeling then might as well teach them from the very beginning that being nice is not the best way to go. So what if they're bullies when they're just gonna grow up into bigger bullies.

William Wordsworth once said that "the best portion of a good man's life is his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love". So be kind and nice people, because niceness is NOT overrated.

so yay for niceness and yay till later!